A Miracle in the Parish Hall

Last Wednesday night, something truly remarkable occurred right here at St. Alban’s in the Parish Hall. No, it wasn’t water becoming wine, but it was still something I would call miraculous.

Here’s what happened: Fortified by a nutritious and delicious meal, more than 50 people gathered to learn how to pray aloud extemporaneously. This in and of itself was a wonder. But the miracle didn’t stop there!

Here’s what happened next. When I asked the group to raise their hands if they felt comfortable praying aloud in front of other people, a few hands went up. But when I asked the group if they would like to be someone who feels comfortable praying aloud, almost all of the hands in the room went up. Clearly the desire was there.

After first discussing how to get in the right mindset, I shared my tried-and-true strategy for whenever I am asked to pray and I don’t already have something prepared. Finally, after a bit more instruction and encouragement, I invited everyone to pair up and practice praying aloud with just one other person. Even though I wasn’t asking anyone to pray aloud in front of the whole group, I still saw quite a few panicked looks on the faces staring back at me. But, with courage and faith, folks began to pair up with one another and dispersed themselves around the room, two by two, for a time of prayer.

After a few minutes, the whole vibe of the room shifted dramatically. The atmosphere of caution and nervous energy became one of earnest connection. I noticed the spiritual energy coursing around the room. The Holy Spirit had shown up in the Parish Hall, and we could feel it.

Now, I know that praying in a church is not an unusual occurrence. But this kind of praying required many folks to take a step beyond their comfort zone, and the results were incredible. When I called the group together again, the faces looking back at me were smiling broadly. The power of prayer is tangible, and to be there to bear witness to this miraculous moment was such a privilege for me.

I don’t know if any of you who were there that night have found other opportunities to practice this kind of praying in the past week. But I hope you will keep at it! You are all miracles to me—every one of you.

For those who weren’t able to be there, below you’ll find some of the notes I shared with those who attended the workshop. I hope you find them helpful!

Yours in Christ,

Carmen

How to Say Grace

(A beginner’s guide to fearlessly leading spontaneous prayers aloud)

We are part of a denomination that is blessed with a beautiful Book of Common Prayer. And I love to use it for so many occasions! However, there are times when we don’t have access to it, or when an unscripted prayer may be more appropriate. Yet, for many deeply faithful Christians, praying aloud extemporaneously in the presence of others can be intimidating or uncomfortable. But it doesn’t have to be!

I will begin by suggesting that praying aloud extemporaneously with confidence and grace is approximately 10% practice and 90% mentality or mindset.

To help you get into the mindset needed for fearlessly praying aloud, we need to get clear on the overall GOAL of prayer. Why do we pray? What are we hoping for anytime we pray, whether we are saying a blessing before a big group meal, or doing Centering Prayer by ourselves in our backyard, or saying the Lord’s Prayer as one voice among many in church on Sunday?

I believe that the goal of prayer is communion with God. By extension, the goal of prayer is NOT to show off our eloquence, or intellect, or our impressive vocabulary, or even our faith.

So if the goal of prayer is simply to commune with God, and not to impress anyone with how articulate or faithful we are, wouldn’t it follow that the only opinion that matters when it comes to our praying…is God’s? I happen to believe that God is not in the business of judging the quality of our prayers. I believe that God simply desires relationship and communion with us, and so anytime we show up in prayer, God is as pleased as can be, regardless of what words we use or don’t use, regardless of the length or brevity of our prayer, and regardless of the volume or timber of our voice.

Another way we might say this is that the goal of prayer is NOT to wow God or anyone else, but rather to be wowed by God. To pray is to get to be a mere mortal in relationship with the Immortal One, an ordinary human in communication and in communion the Divine. That is, in and of itself, astounding.

And let me clear something up while we are at it…I sometimes hear from people who think that those of us who wear collars or have seminary degrees have some sort of direct line to God’s ear. And today, I’m going to tell you the truth that…we absolutely do.

AND laypersons have the VERY SAME DIRECT LINE! We all have a direct line! It is a truly extraordinary thing that we have a God who is so very accessible to any and all of us if we are willing to use our direct line.

And the more we use it, the more at home we will feel when using it. So, one of the best things you can do to get comfortable with leading prayers in public is to cultivate a rich and full private prayer life. That said, even when your private prayer life may not be as robust as you’d like for it to be, there’s no penalty. There is simply your God, longing to be in conversation and communion with you. You are not being graded on the quality or the quantity of your prayers.

Now, let’s address what to do when there are other people in the room. When leading public prayers, we have an “audience,” for lack of a better term. And even when we know that the goal of prayer is not to impress anyone, we may still sometimes have the desire to offer a prayer that is coherent and relevant, especially when we’ve been asked to pray on behalf of a group. We want to do a good job; we don’t want to say or do anything that would embarrass ourselves or have anyone else judging us. But here’s the thing about other people judging us. Most of the time, when we think someone is judging us, in reality, absolutely NOBODY is judging us except ourselves, and we are always our harshest critic. And on the rare occasion that someone is being judgmental, that’s their issue, not ours.

If you offer a prayer and ramble on a bit longer than you meant to, or you stumble over your words briefly, or you leave a long awkward silence—so what? I do all these things quite frequently when praying. It’s ok.

Let’s take some inspiration from Holy Scripture, beginning with those wonderful words from Paul’s letter to the Christians in Philippi: Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your gentleness be known to everyone. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. -Philippians 4:4-9. There is no need to feel anxious, because when you pray, you are communicating first and foremost with Love Incarnate. Whether or not you have others listening as you talk to God is irrelevant.

Let us then with confidence draw near to the throne of grace, that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need. -Hebrews 4:16. If we summon our confidence in God, we will have all the help we need.

And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. -1 John 5:14. To know that we are heard in whatever we ask is enough, because communion with God is the goal of prayer.

And now, here is my simple, time-tested strategy for organizing my thoughts when I am called on to pray. First, I name something I believe to be true about God. Then, I take stock of what I am most thankful for in that moment. And finally, I think about what needs God’s attention. In practice, it looks something like this:

1.     Say something you believe to be true about God:

God, you…love us and are always there when we need you.

2.     Add something for which your heart is grateful:

Thank you for…the gift of a nourishing meal, and time with our church family.

3.     Offer any hopes or needs that are on your heart:

I/we ask you…to give us the confidence needed to trust in you.

4.     Amen!

It’s really that simple. If you try it, let me know how it goes for you—I would love to hear!